Growing up I recall thinking and/or saying the phrase “it’s not fair” on a regular basis.  I distinctly remember my sister receiving an elaborate art kit for Christmas that was so big, beautiful and full of amazing colors, while I got a sweater…filled with envy, believing her gift was far more valuable than mine and brought far more attention, I thought, “it’s not fair!”  As I grew older it seemed totally unfair that I had to study so much to get an A on my schoolwork, while some of my friends seemed to get excellent grades with no effort at all…I was convinced this was dishonest gain; my friends were not even working for their excellent grades, “it’s not fair!”  Then, some of my friends had later curfews and that wasn’t ‘fair’ under the ‘proper’ rules for teens, by that I mean: the rules that were being applied to me in my house.  Later, when I was not selected to be in the sorority I thought I should be in…I became angry and thought about the biases that were probably stacked against me and proclaimed “it’s not fair!” A few other things that I deemed ‘not fair’ include: the death of a loved one, being in an abusive relationship, not getting a promotion I felt I had earned, the due date for my first baby being changed to a much later date (hello?!  the nursery was ready to go, I already told everyone the first due date and I WANT TO MEET THIS BABY!), not being invited to a certain function, my children being excluded from something, my husband being hurt, and the list could go on and on.  As I look back on my life, some of my largest and smallest disappointments and unfulfilled expectations have made me want to whisper, scream, or cry the words ‘it’s not fair!’ and every time I did that…I made God a liar, and myself and often my sinful desires an idol.  Over the years God has helped me to see that I wanted my desire over His.  I wanted my timing, my plan, my gain, my pleasure, and my way.  God wanted me to be patient and wait on His timing; trust in His plan; desire His pleasure and do things His way.  So now when I’m tempted to think or say “it’s not fair!” I remind myself of these 5 things.  


  1. God is fair.  He is not biased and does not have favorites.  God knows all, sees all and is perfect & holy. “For God does not show favoritism.” Romans 2:11 NLT
  2. God is honest and just.  Everything God does is proper and right.   “God is an honest judge. He is angry with the wicked every day.” Psalm 7:11 NLT
  3. God is enough. “And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:19 NLT
  4. God can make all things good (even the most ‘unfair’ circumstances) for those who love Him and are called according to His purposes. (Romans 8:28 NLT)
  5. Finally, what is really ‘unfair’ is that a sinner like me whom God said deserved death,  received full forgiveness of sin and my death penalty for that sin has been removed.   I am able to enjoy the presence of God both on Earth now and while living for all eternity in Heaven because of Jesus’ willingness to trust His Father’s timing and plan; and to do things His Father’s way.   I’m so grateful Jesus never uttered “it’s not fair!” (to learn more about how to have and grow in a relationship with Jesus click here)

Is there anything happening in your life right now that you think is “unfair?”  Trust the man that died for you with it; rest in His perfect peace, trust His righteous judgement, believe that He will provide and watch as He makes something good come from it.  He loves you; put your faith, hope and trust in Jesus.  He is trustworthy.  

 In His Love~ 

Jamie Shaver