Do you sometimes feel insecure?
Have you ever found yourself comparing yourself with others? Or ‘keeping score’ in your mind about what others have done or accomplished?
Do you feel like a victim sometimes? Or feel that you are owed compensation for your losses?
Are you self-consumed and trying to outdo others for attention? Or judge others and find yourself in self-pity or full of conceit?
Lastly, do you ever determine that you must take charge, protect your interests and manipulate the situation to get your way?
Insecure people will often experience one of the above situations on a regular basis. Insecurities come when we make ourselves an idol instead of keeping our eyes fixed on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith. When we are thinking about promises Jesus makes (the Word), the lessons His Spirit wants to teach us (the truth), or the person of Jesus (the way), we do not compare…because we recognize that we have been bought with a price. That we are not our own, that God takes care of our interests, that He is in control and that even when you are not able…God still is! There is always hope when we take control of our thoughts and align them with Jesus’.
So what do you do if you want to reduce personal insecurities?
There are several things you can do and I’m going to focus on one of them today.
Build your identity in Christ, not your performance. Your performance does not define who you are, God does.
Allow God to work in your heart and ask Him to reveal where you are too self-sufficient or self-promoting. Ask Him to help you be more God-sufficient and Jesus-promoting.
Discover & practice your God-given purpose in life, not someone else’s (stop trying to act, talk, present, or do anything the way someone else does it…do it the way you were created to do it!)
Learn to give and receive affirmation.
When people are insecure, they have a hard time accepting affirmation even if they are good at giving it. If I say, “I love your shirt, it’s really cute.” I will get a response that removes the value of the shirt or compliment that sounds like this, “Oh not really, I’ve had it forever…I got it on clearance…” as if to tell me, “it’s really not that cute, I’m not worthy and neither is this shirt of your compliment.” If I were to tell you that a compliment from another person is like a gift that they bought and wrapped to give you on your birthday, would you still totally reject it? When your insecurities keep you from accepting compliments, praise or affirmation at face value then you are rejecting a gift that another person wants to give you.
In working with people over the years I have learned that often insecure people are insecure because they judge others harshly and therefore feel as though the internal thoughts of others are equally as harsh toward them. To overcome this I want you to practice giving genuine compliments to others wherever you go. Find something truthful, that is positive to say to brighten someone else’s day. Your challenge this week is to genuinely compliment someone each day. God tells us that it is a greater blessing to give than to receive. The second part of this challenge is if someone compliments you, that you simply say, “Thank you so much,” with a big smile and receive the kindness.
God loves you so much that He holds nothing back! He was even willing to give His very own Son! “He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?”
Thank God for all that He has done for you, and receive His love and then share it with others. You can have security when you live your life from the outpouring of His love for you and for others.
You are fearfully and wonderfully made, and you have been given the mind of Christ~