“We’re going to give you some ‘sleepy’ medicine and you won’t remember a thing”, the doctor said confidently to my 15 year old son who recently broke his arm in 2 places and fractured a bone in his wrist.
“I do this hundreds of times a week, and I can tell you that whatever you think about before you go to sleep, you will likely dream about while you’re under”, he continued.
The doctor’s comment reminded me of when my ‘druggy roommate’ from college made the exact same comment to me when she tried to convince me to try acid. To this day, I still thank God that I never took her up on that offer! It sounded horrifying to me when she’d made the comment, and as I sat there by my son at Children’s Hospital listening to the doctor, I could feel fear rising up within me.
My first thought was, “I hope he has a good ‘trip’”, but then I was assailed by another thought, “But what if he has a bad trip?” Before I knew it, uninvited, fearful thoughts began to roll over me like a fast moving river. Thoughts like: “What if he has some crazy allergic reaction to the drug and he goes into heart failure? What if this makes him somehow prone to try drugs in the future? What if he doesn’t come out of the sedation? Did they tell me every possible risk? The anesthesiologist seems really young, and they seem disorganized here, so can I trust them with my son? Did they remember to make sure that oxygen mask is working? Those and other similar questions all rooted in fear went on and on until I thought to do what I should have done right away: to pray! So then I prayed. I started with…
C- Confession: “God, I’m afraid right now. I don’t like that my son is in so much pain. I feel like he never gets a chance because it’s been one injury after another for a year now. I don’t like that you’re allowing this!”
P- Professing God’s truth:”I know you will never leave him or forsake him. Thank you, God, that you are with him right now, even when I’m not in the room with him, even when I had to watch him be put to sleep with a drug that seems scary to me. I rejoice in knowing that you’re always with him, whether I am with or absent from him. I know that You’re in control! You’re a good Father, and whatever situation we are in, You can make it good for those who love You and are called according to Your purposes. Thank You that You love us God, thank You that we have such great medical facilities available to us, thank You that they can fix this, thank You that you made our bodies so incredibly well…
Before the procedure began, the doctors had said it would take less than 10 minutes, so when they hadn’t come out to the waiting room after 30 minutes had passed, fear started to arise in me again. So I started professing the truths above again.
When we finally were escorted back to the room, the doctors and nurses were laughing at my son’s drug induced stream of consciousness that was pouring out of his mouth. They thought my husband and I would be equally as amused. I wasn’t. I hated it. He was not in control of his mind or the words he said; everything he said sounded very distorted. He was saying literally every thought that he had out loud, without any filter or ability to control his speech. It was suggested to us that while he was still under the effect of what they labeled “truth serum” that my husband and I should ask him questions so we could learn things about our teenage son. They thought it’d be funny if we asked him, “Do you have a secret girlfriend? Have you ever tried drugs?” I was horrified by the suggestion and had no interest whatsoever in taking advantage of my son’s inability to control his thoughts or his words!
I was so very blessed, however, when my husband walked into the room and my son announced to everyone, “That’s my dad! He’s my best friend! I love him and we travel everywhere together!” Over and over again—at what seemed like ‘a million miles a minute’— he repeated, “I love my dad! He’s my best friend!” He definitely was ‘high’, acting like he was on a crazy ‘trip’ as he continually talked away. Once he was back to normal, we were amazed that he remembered much of what he’d said while under the influence of the drug. He told us how he hated that he had no control of the thoughts he had, or the fact that he would just speak out his thoughts for all to hear.
The entire staff had fallen in love with Tyler. Why? They loved what had come out of his mouth! They asked him questions about kids doing drugs at his school, and he started crying, saying he wished the kids would stop and that he didn’t want people to do drugs. It amazed them that he could be under the influence of this “truth serum” but nothing bad was coming out of his mouth! Before administering the drug, they’d warned me that there well could be a lot of swear words that would come out of his mouth, but there weren’t any. They warned me that I may hear and learn a lot of things I didn’t know about him, but I didn’t. When they repeatedly told me what a good child we had, I repeatedly pointed them to God, and told them it was only because the Holy Spirit lived inside of him.
I don’t share this with you to boast in my son. We certainly know he’s not perfect. However, I do want to boast in his and our God, Who is perfect! To boast that with God, ‘all things are possible’! And to share that we can know that there is a ‘truth serum’—the Holy Spirit— Who lives in the hearts of those who believe in Jesus as their Savior and Lord! The Holy Spirit is our teacher who guides us to know the truth, He leads us to speak the truth, and He leads us in the way that pleases the Lord. When we seek to know the truth revealed in God’s word, speak what we hear the Spirit saying, are truthful regarding who we are and what we have done, recognize that there is no condemnation for those who have accepted Jesus as their Savior, and through the power of the Holy Spirit Who dwells in us live in accordance with God’s commands, we will experience the freedom that Christ died to give us.
Tyler’s experience with the ‘truth serum’ at the hospital reminded me of the scripture below:
“The good person out of his good treasure brings forth good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure brings forth evil. I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” Matthew 12:35-37 ESV
May we all be willing to confess our sins to God and to one another so that we may be healed, and our relationships with God and other people can be restored. I pray that we all realize that the words we speak will justify or condemn us, and that we would choose to be clean, pure vessels that bring glory to God! I also pray that we would operate at all times under the ‘truth serum’ that is the Holy Spirit in our lives, for our good and for His glory and His kingdom purposes.
Written by Jamie
Please pray for Tyler and his recovery. Thank you!